this never happened again. But something else appeared.

I noticed that when I told my friends about my boyfriend, about the relationship, I did two things.

First: she praised him and admired him so much that she looked biased, and the conversation came to a dead end. The girls simply didn’t comment on anything. It turned out that I was deprived of interlocutors.

Second: I still told them some details that raised questions or strange thoughts in me. Then they entered into a lively conversation. But it turned out that I myself provoked them to dislike my man. As a result, I was all screwed up, and my relationship with him deteriorated again.

It turns out there was no way I could be friends with women anymore.

And then who should I tell everything to, with whom should I share intimate details, sores, constipation, excuse me, dreams, worries, what makes me angry and what makes me happy?

But it turns out that WITH HIM!

Yes, and at this moment it is precisely to check how mature the love between you and your boyfriend is. Is he ready to become your friend, and not just your lover? Is he ready to replace your friends and become, in some way, that same friend?

Yes, my man, he did. Not in everything, but for nine years I forgot about girls. We still keep in touch on social media, but we no longer see each other or communicate truly openly.

I have had women throughout my marriage with whom I shared frank things, but it was rather their job to listen to me and guide me in the right direction. Perhaps you know who I mean. “Counselor”, “mentor” and the like. But I couldn’t help them in the opposite direction, that’s not how it’s supposed to be. Anyway, thanks to them for such work, there were times when I needed them, and my husband could not help in any way.

There were those with whom I wanted to be friends, and my husband didn’t mind, he respected these women, and even recommended them himself, but nothing worked out.

Do you know why?

Every time you complain to your friend about your husband, she falls into a trap. If he supports him, he will lose you. Will support you, the marriage will upset you.

And when my potential girlfriends found themselves in these awkward situations, they immediately washed their hands. I don't blame them. Many married women have this problem. Even when a married woman is friends with the same others, this is a very dangerous path, the risks are absolutely the same. And either you are being disingenuous to each other and not answering honestly the question directly posed, or you risk worsening your understanding with your husband if you are more frank with someone else than with him.

— Does your husband have times when it’s not worth it?

— Well, yes, it happens to everyone.

— Mine doesn’t.

— Damn, I guess I have a problem.

That's it, you got it. This amounts to betrayal. Yes, honestly. Do not laugh. Men will perceive this exactly the same as if you slept with his best friend.

Well, maybe not like that, but something like that.

Or another option:

— Does your husband have times when it’s not worth it?

— No, what are you talking about?

— Damn, I guess I have a problem.

And then you look at how your friend is suffering, looking for a solution, proving that he has early impotence, begging to go to the doctor, quarreling with him, crying that he left her.

Somehow like this.

No, of course you can still have casual small talk. You can communicate superficially about the weather, the pandemic, English courses, and so on. You can communicate deeply on personal topics without touching men, but not for long, it usually ends quickly.

And yet, it is a huge mistake when the targets are not husbands, because experience has taught them “impotence-doctor-divorce,” but children.

Lord, poor children. Here:

— Mine went to the sports section today.

— Wonderful! And mine learned to draw.

— Great, mine doesn’t draw at all, just scribbles.

— Nothing. He will learn. But mine is so plump that I’m also thinking about taking her to sports.

And so on. You know, blah blah blah. If children were as independent as their fathers, they would have long ago given the country coal for constantly washing their bones.

So here it is. I really appreciate women. But we cannot communicate lively and openly only on the topic of health, husband and children.

If hormones control the female consciousness and this is the only fate destined for us, then I wash my hands of it.

That's it, the book is finished, thank you all.

But, we are intellectual beings. We are smart, responsible, purposeful. We are well versed in many areas. I especially noticed that a woman can compete with men in marketing, PR, sales, management, finance and medicine. Maybe we are worse as engineers and astronauts, but that’s also debatable.

So it turns out that there are still topics for a lively conversation? Or do we do all this in order not to think about men, sex and children?

I smile.

Yes, the motive is different.

Do you understand?

Men do this for the sake of self-affirmation, financial independence, and freedom.

Women, so as not to think and chat with friends about men, children and sex.

What if the most carefree among us, who does not want to give birth, get married, or have sex, simply builds a career and finally accumulates enough money in the bank to fly on a passenger flight into earth orbit, and maybe into space?

What topics do you think she will talk about with her friends?

Not at all. She will be friends with men. Dot.

This is my theory. You may not agree with her, but no