more than meets the eye» is opposite to the central thought of Sartrian existentialism — that's why Highsmith called one of her short stories, with a woman narrative, Nothing That Meets The Eye (does woman have a soul, she answered «Innocence» — Peter would have never started praising her had she not been transcendent); Highsmith, very much like Peckinpah, reached a point where her belief in innocence was subjugated to animal creatures, children and an occasional Mexican woman-servant (where 'belief in innocence' means being able to love), а вы думали, я буду рвать и метать, что у меня забрали жизнь (вазари, бл***)

8 СЕНТЯБРЯ, воскресенье — Федору Бондарчуку не повезло по-крупному уже трижды, something stops his directing career — he, he stops his directing career; вышел за водой

9 СЕНТЯБРЯ, понедельник — if it weren't for our rockets on Cuba the whole American political life in the 1960s would have been remembered only for Marilyn Monroe's singing gig and the sheer effort to recall Lyndon B. Johnson's name; освободили город, как французы; to pull an Igor — дернуть Игорька

1 °CЕНТЯБРЯ, вторник — утро с Джошем Дюамелем и Стэйси Фергюсон; вышел поесть в Шоколадницу в БУМе

11 СЕНТЯБРЯ, среда — утро с Лерой Кудрявцевой, разобрались со вспышками «уродства», более-менее, in 1998 British Empire laid in ruins: stiff upper lip was a forgotten word and Sir Alex Ferguson chewed a gum; вспоминал a film with three men, как Двойная команда в 90-х; where did all the fat people go from the screen: have we become intolerant to humility (humiliation); Tory is a euphemism; it's not infantile not to reject democratic ideals

12 СЕНТЯБРЯ, четверг — у вас нет никакого трансцендентного видения, кто вам сказал, что вы можете управлять чем-либо; Atonement Wow; Венский конгресс 2014 года — Венский конгресс одного человека: я буду танцевать; ночное: осколки Лилии; it was indecent to spend the night with her on that 9/11 day three years ago, behind her parents' back, she was a bad girl but that wasn't a night to teach her a lesson — not under her own roof, so I cited another reason; Venice Film Festival closes on Sunday

13–14 СЕНТЯБРЯ, пятница-суббота

another question is: to what extent conscience will allow you to use George, the G-eyes (Oedipus' brother, a Siamese twin); K-PAX is epistemologically wrong; родина и отечество (анахронизм, watch); The Town is a film about Russia — come to Russia, we'll show you so many towns; Oh.. Rosalinda!! is a porn horror with fun; Парусия Дортмунд

the only conquest…

the only conquest…

only that conquers…

только кающийся человек…

только кающийся может…

когда человек кается, он встает на колени…

на колени!

глава Power and Conquest

15 СЕНТЯБРЯ, воскресенье — what basically happened is that in a moment when men should have broken away from material attachments of the previous decade and enter some sort of transcendent quest a person of their sex appeared who paved that very same way for them — and they weren't able to overcome jealousy and started doing the completely opposite thing, succumbing to temptations by those very things they were suffering from as men; M: I-2 — how to use guns in a Christian way, a moral problem, use of firearms as martial arts (self-defense), also: if he didn’t use firearm on other person (and Christianity teaches us that he shouldn’t have had) he wouldn’t have stopped a contamination (but it’s not an answer, it’s a question); Mulitplicity, jealousy, Jewish horror and fun

SEVEN THOUGHTS

Худеем со вторника с Юлией Высоцкой

они думали, что «Чучело» — это про чучело, а «Идиот» — это про идиота

Arabic States: how Europe would have been called if it weren't for me

anti-world is just a show (life-affirming)

пятница — в ресторане Ёрш играла песня группы «Любэ» — Аляска, Екатерина — when Russian hear 'bourgeois' they think 'aristocracy', meaning 'tsarism' — that's what we started thinking, immediately, after 1991; that's how we see the French revolution — as if if was an October one (that's why the February one didn't work)

а теперь он, наверное, примет катастрофу так же героически, каким героическим королем он был: «just the same»

у вас — свобода имморализма, основанная на ограничивании свободы моего трансцендирующего субъекта; у меня — свобода морального акта, основанная на ограничивании свободы моего члена

SEVEN THOUGHTS

they didn’t understand that if they loved me so much that I wouldn’t believe it and if I would develop a close personal connection to each one of them I shall dedicate the rest of my life to the quest of saving their souls, whatever they did — that’s also why I needed the 700

a Joking Christ — two for the price of one: you get a Christ who is also into humour

2-го октября взялся наконец за «Кукольный дом», встретилась фраза: «примечательно еще вот что: слова „второе октября“ и год написаны не почерком Вашего отца, но другим, который мне кажется знакомым».

you don’t watch clips in which you are praised or other people are being disgraced/humiliated when you are in bed with a woman

think about England — as a British wife said to her husband on their wedding night

my demands are based on moral acts on your behalf

I think you've exaggerated travelling and being accepted in celebrity circles as values of contemporary society

НЕДЕЛЯ

во вторник не спал всю ночь

продолжение вчерашней истории о том, что мне 18 лет, а не 28, в зеркале

утро с неандертальцем: Дарвин, neant (неан) и Божественная среда

со злости стал произносить, вслух и про себя, математические примеры и просто цифры (отсутствие образа, помимо, собственно, цифрового знака). продержался недолго — слишком негативный способ решения проблемы

so, basically you're admitting that by now you understood you're doing a terrible harm to yourselves but you don't want to stop because you don't want me to feel good because of it, feel good for YOU

вообще это все похоже на разговор клинического